Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Novelty and 'non-specific arousability'

I used to have a blog on Wordpress that got terminated due to pornographic content. Here's one of those posts... (NB: the links are all dead so don't bother) 


Nero posted: " I've been following Z and her Pervertically Virtuous blog for sometime now. You need to check it out too, I'm not going to even attempt to explain her - but she's quite unique. She's a deep thinker (she has PhD) and often gets in"

recovered post on Her Secret Library

Novelty and 'non-specific arousability'

by Nero
I've been following Z and her Pervertically Virtuous blog for sometime now. You need to check it out too, I'm not going to even attempt to explain her - but she's quite unique. She's a deep thinker (she has PhD) and often gets into the psychology behind sexuality. When she wrote this post I was moved to respond with my own story and make the following comment:
You mentioned a couple of things that resonated with me, namely "need for novelty/diversity" and "non-specific arousability". I've long suspected my wife shares those traits, although not to the extent you do. (Then again, who knows what lurks in the deep recesses of her mind?)
As readers of my blog will know, I spend a lot of time complaining about not getting enough sex (a common complaint amongst bloggers) but the fact is my wife and I do have sex, just not with the frequency I desire. Part of that I put down to her non-specific arousability. I can never be sure (even after all these years together) what will turn her on - so I just have to be ready to go when she's ready to go. I have tried all manner of things to get her going myself, but what she responded to or wanted last week may not work this week.
Which is where novelty comes in. If I do something different or unexpected (ie a position or activity) then that seems to work - but only in that moment. If I try that move again I can just as easily fall flat on my face. I've long thought her appreciation of novelty puts paid to the myth that women are monogamous. My wife may have chosen to *be* monogamous but that doesn't necessarily mean she's not imagining I'm someone else when she closes her eyes while I'm doing something different or unexpected.
A few posts back you joked about cloning yourself for the benefit of your readers and one time sex partners who wanted another ride on the PV train. I'd be happy if you could just bottle 'Essence of PV' so that my wife could use it as a perfume - she might share some of your traits (to a much lesser degree) but she never initiates and never articulates her wants and desires. If more women did that (because there are plenty of female bloggers also complaining about not getting enough sex) instead of clinging to the foolish notion that "if he really loves/understands me then he'll know how to get me going" then more couples might get the sex they're looking for.
That you know yourself (sexually) so well and get what you want/desire/need is a rarity in this society (although I suspect you see it as no more special than breathing).
Nero | February 5, 2014 at 12:30 pm | Tags: novelty, OPP, other people's posts 

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Sinful Sunday #2