Saturday, August 6, 2016

The Whys and Hows of Finding Sex Online

This is not one of my old posts, but one by Pervertically Virtuous
In the process of recovering my own old posts via email I discovered some of hers. Like me, her old accounts have been terminated, and she seems to have disappeared from the internet. This is a damn shame since I consider her one of the best sex bloggers I've ever had the chance to read and follow. I'm reposting her old posts as a historical archive, and if she ever returns to blogging I'm happy to hand them back to her.
To be clear: the copyright on this work is hers, and remains with her - I didn't write it and I make no claim to it. 

(FYI: some links in this post are dead)

Pervertically Virtuous posted: "Meeting casual partners offline is great. There's the serendipity of finding each other, the thrill and ego-boost of the mutual attraction, the mystery and anticipation of what they look like naked... I certainly try to meet people in real life every chan"

recovered post by Pervertically Virtuous

The Whys and Hows of Finding Sex Online

by Pervertically Virtuous
Meeting casual partners offline is great. There's the serendipity of finding each other, the thrill and ego-boost of the mutual attraction, the mystery and anticipation of what they look like naked... I certainly try to meet people in real life every chance I get: parties, bars, streets, buses, friends, classes, couchsurfing, nude drawing classes... If there are people around, I'm checking them out .

So why bother finding sex partners online?

Because meeting people offline is not always easy. Depending on your lifestyle, daily schedule, personality, and sexual interests, meeting people you want to fuck and want to fuck you can be quite challenging. If you live in a small town, or work from home, or drive to work, or are shy, chances are you don't run into many new people. This is especially true if you're looking for something or someone unusual. Even a hot, horny, outgoing, mobile woman like myself living in NYC doesn't just randomly run into two hot bisexual guys who want to have a threesome, or a gorgeous transsexual woman who wants to fuck her and her husband together, or a submissive man who wants to be pissed on and pierced with needles. Even something less unusual - like a single black guy in a very white area - can be challenging to find without some online help. And things get exponentially more difficult for men trying to find female partners - with usual or unusual characteristics and desires.
Because meeting people offline can take a very long time. You might get lucky and just meet that gorgeous T-girl or black man while going to the grocery store, but then again, it might not happen for a long time. Or ever.
Because meeting people offline comes with a lot of uncertainty. Even if you do happen to meet your preferred demographic, will they be interested in you? Will they have what you want under their clothes? Will they share your kinks? You don't know, and usually you don't really get to find out until much later, after having invested a lot of time and effort.
If you're anything like me, you too don't have a lot of patience or time to sit back and merely hope that life will just throw at you all those exciting sexual experiences that you desire and fantasize about. You too like to take your sex life into your own hands and maximize your chances that on your deathbed your sexual bucket list will be empty. And you too know that life is painfully short and there's no time to waste.
If you have a specific type of itch, the easiest and quickest way to scratch it is online. There are more people online - of every shape, size, interest, and kink - than you'll ever be able to meet offline. The most important deal makers and deal breakers get communicated quickly, and efficiently. There's no fear of getting judged for wanting what you want when so many others want the same. Sure, you may have to sift through a lot of different profiles, many of them fake or inappropriate, but that's much faster and easier than waiting for an offline miracle.

So how do you go about finding casual sex partners online?

First and foremost, find the right online community.
If you're just starting out in the world of online dating and sex, that world might seem daunting. Once upon a time there was only a handful of websites, but today there are so many online communities that cater to different people, needs, and geographical areas   that figuring out where to go and how to go about it can be truly overwhelming. There are websites for dating, for general casual sex, for cheating spouses, for sugar babies/daddies, for swingers, for polyamorists, for kinky people, for transsexuals, for beautiful people only, for the terminally ill, for Star Trek fans, for the 420 friendly, for inter-generational dating, for STI-positive people... You name it, the World Wide Web has it.
Of course, there's always Craigslist, which has every possible flavor under the sun, but CL can be a major pain in the ass (see for example my recent Craigslist fiasco trying to find a big black cock). People on CL are often fake and even more often flaky - the initial investment is so low that many create an ad or respond to one when horny and on a whim, but when it comes to going through with it, they simply don't. Websites where you have to create a profile, or even more so, pay a membership fee, require more investment and therefore attract people who are more serious in their quest for finding what they're fantasizing about.
This is where a website like XXX Sex Guides can come in very handy. XXX Sex Guides reviews the various online sex and dating websites, with all the pros, cons, and particulars of each site. They categorize them by niche (swingers, transsexuals, femdom, bondage...), and they pay attention to the countries and continents that the various sites cater to most. They even provide some online dating tips. And, if you're a guy, you can search for your ultimate one-night stand fantasy right there and then. Handy indeed.
Finding the right community is important. Do your research before you join. Creating a decent profile takes some time, so don't waste it unless you know that website is the right one for you.
2. Create a decent profile.
For Christ's sake, create a complete, informative profile. You don't have to answer every single question provided, but try to fill out at least 50-75% of all fields. Include pictures of yourself. Nice ones. They don't have to show your face necessarily, but they have to show something of you. Preferably not just your cock. Show some effort. It will pay off.
3. Send lots of respectful decent messages. Especially if you're a guy.
In the world of online dating and sex, the sexes are most definitely not equal. Women are the privileged ones by the virtue of their numbers. So a lot of women never email men first, they wait for men to email them and then choose from the best offers. It's not fair, but it's the reality. So if you're a guy, you must spend some time emailing them with something more than "u r hot, wanna fck?" And if you're a woman, don't be such a passive recipient of male attention. Choosing the best of what has come to you is not necessarily the best of what's out there. How do you know you're not missing out on the really hot, nice, cool guys who are just a tad too shy or tad too busy to email every woman with a profile?
Of course, none of these things guarantee you'll get laid, but they sure will increase your chances.
What are you waiting for? Go get started with your research, and let me know of the results.
This post was brought to you by XXX Sex Guides.
Pervertically Virtuous | August 6, 2013 at 10:38 am | Categories: Sex Stories | 

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