Monday, November 6, 2017

Fucking Friday

So last Saturday we had sex and my wife had some intense orgasms (details here) so I naturally assumed she would want more on Sunday, since I'd caught her at various times reading her dirty stories on her iPad. She politely demurred and said "maybe later." I tried to seduce her on Monday night (as she read her dirty stories on her iPad) but she again demurred: "wait until Wednesday."

On Wednesday we watched TV until about 10pm and then my wife said she was going up to bed. I presumed this was her cue for our Wednesday night scheduled sex arrangement (since she often says that the reason we don't have sex is because we go too bed too late and she's tired). My wife can take 20+ minutes in the bathroom ensuite getting ready for bed (lotions, potions, and what not) so I waited 15 minutes and then followed her up.

The lights were out, the bedroom was pitch black, and my wife was asleep.

I considered poking her with a stick (figuratively) to see if she really was asleep, but I decided that was too juvenile. Besides, if she was going to pretend to be asleep then I didn't feel like pretending to wake her up so I could have sex with her. Because that would be pretty lame. So I went back downstairs and watched Netflix.

On Friday we watched TV until about 10pm and then I told my wife I was going up to bed. She barely responded since she was 'multitasking' i.e. surreptitiously reading her dirty stories on her iPad while 'we' watched TV (one of 'her' shows BTW) so I spelled it out explicitly: "I'll have a shower first, and then we can have sex after!"  She heard that because she said "Really?" to which I replied "well, you prefer me clean don't you?"  Then I went upstairs and had a shower.

After the shower I climbed into bed and checked the time. During the shower I had decided that if my wife didn't come upstairs after I'd finished my shower I would start sexting her from the bedroom. "How long does a guy have to wait get his dick sucked?" I planned to say, followed a few minutes later with "Shall I start without you?" if she still hadn't come upstairs. Just thinking about it had given me great big throbbing hard-on in the shower, so I was already primed for action. (Soaping your dick while you're comprising dirty texts in your head is a recipe for disaster BTW - it was all I could do not to finish myself off in there)

I was just about to send the first text when I heard my wife coming up the stairs.

"Oh" said my wife, as if finding me naked in bed was a complete surprise. "Hurry up" I replied, "I was just about to start without you."

My wife didn't take too long in the ensuite and soon enough she was beside me in the bed, wearing a chemise. We kissed and cuddled and my hands fondled her breasts, her hardened nipples revealing I was not the only one who was horny. I left one hand on one breast and sent the other further south, seeking out her pussy. My wife spread her legs a little but as soon as my hand was on her vulva she clamped them shut again.

It's hard to explain but my wife sometimes likes it this way: I have to struggle to force my fingers between her legs, and the most I can get is a finger pressed against her clit. At this point she grinds against me, hard, and does her best to break my hand. Friday night was just like that. I squeezed her breast roughly with my free hand and struggled with the other to find her wet hole. Her whole body writhed against me as she fought me, squeezing her legs together, trying to stop my fingers from finding their prize.

I looked for some softcore images of a BJ but there aren't any
- unless you wanted a woman eating a banana lasciviously?
(But at least I hid it halfway down the page - I hope you weren't too offended)
I had one finger on her clit the whole time, as the others tried to burrow down so I could finger her wet slit. She moaned softly as she stretched, each time somehow pushing her hole just out of reach. I know she has a fear of cystitis but this was getting ridiculous - I'd just had a shower ferchrissakes, I was as clean as a whistle!

I still managed to keep one finger pressed hard against (and rubbing) her clit and she must have cum because she relaxed suddenly and my other fingers were able to travel down further between her pussy lips.

Wet doesn't even describe how she felt down there. I stuck one finger inside her delicious sopping hole for one fleeting moment before my wife pulled back and away from me. She rotated her body and grabbed my cock, stroking it vigorously as soon as she had it in her hand. There was no slow soft sensual buildup whatsoever, just BAM!  She was going for it at a 100 miles an hour. It was like she was determined to get me off with a hand job - as if she'd read me commenting somewhere about how I don't cum from a hand job or a blowjob?

The paranoia was fleeting because I could see my cock was big, thick, long, and throbbing - so hard the head was purple. She could probably tell I was ready to pop so wanted me to get off quickly.

I told her I was getting close and asked her if she wanted to ride me first before I came. She said 'No' and told me that she wanted me to cum 'like this' - and started jacking my cock even harder and faster. It felt good but it also kinda hurt. I looked down and saw that she had an odd technique, which explained why I was both bursting to cum and yet also not cumming. She had cupped her hand into a little sheath, so that her fingers could stimulate my cock vertically as she pumped up and down, but this meant the palm of her hand was bashing the head of my cock on every downstroke.

Maybe that works for some people but it wasn't working for me. Maybe she'd seen it in a porno (which I highly doubt - she prefers reading 'erotica' to watching 'porn') or maybe she'd misunderstood the description of something that sounded hot in one of her dirty stories? Either way I was gonna have to get her to stop what she was doing because it was making my head dry and sore.

"The head of my cock is really dry" I explained, "you're gonna need some lube or something... something wet"

The latter was a hint that she should blow me but it went over her head. She spat on her fingers and licked the palm of her hand. Again, I had no idea what was going through her mind at that moment but it still wasn't working for me so I made my instructions more explicit: "Can you suck my cock please?" That hint she understood so she grabbed my prick and started licking the tip with her tongue.

I was quite vexed as to why she was so tentative. She was licking the head like it was her first time. I cooed 'mmmmmm" to give her some encouragement, and then groaned as she swallowed me whole. Soon she was licking and sucking on my dick like it was candy, combining her mouth action with her fingers on my cock and balls. It felt good.

She placed her hands on the mattress astride my hips and with elbows out she started bobbing up and down on my cock with her wet mouth, sucking hard. It felt very good and I was ready to cum. I warned her I was ready to cum and asked her 'how she wanted it?' - a gentleman should always ask, right? I'd hate for her to get a full load down her throat if she wasn't expecting it.

"Cum all over my tits" she purred, as she released her mouth from the head of my dick and started jacking me hard. "I wanna feel you splash all over these" she continued, as she rubbed my throbbing cock all over her breasts, smearing the tip across both of her rock hard nipples. I knew what she wanted - it was a fantasy of hers. She wanted me to spray a bucket of jism all over her pretty titties, just like they do in the porno movies (or in her dirty stories, possibly?) but I knew from experience that when we do it this way (me on my back, her jacking my cock between her boobs) all that happens is the cum rockets out and arcs across my chest.

So if she wanted the 'pornstar experience' we'd have to do it differently. I told her to get up and kneel on the floor beside the bed; tossing a pillow down as I spoke. She did as instructed and I sat up and started jacking my cock between her breasts. She held them up, cupping them below my balls. Her boobs jiggled as I pumped my cock and it wasn't long before she was bending down to take my cock in her mouth. She took over hand duties as well, and commenced jacking me off whilst sucking me off at the same time. It felt very good.

I groaned and sank back onto the bed.

I lay there with my feet hanging over the side of the bed as she jerked me off for a bit, before once again placing her hands beside my hips and deep throating me - hard and fast. She bounced up and down on my cock like a pro and I knew it wouldn't be long before I was about to cum. In fact it was quicker than I thought.

"I'm gonna cum!" I gasped, by way of warning. This only spurred her on and she deep throated me even deeper, shaking her head sideways as she did so. She was sucking harder too, and I couldn't hold back. "I'm cum-nnnng!" I grunted, as my body spasmed and flung forward suddenly. I was upright now, and I grabbed the sides of her head and started thrusting into her warm wet mouth, ejaculating a gallon of cum down her throat.

Seriously, there was a lot there. I released her head and put my arms behind my back, on the mattress for support, propping myself up as I continued my orgasm. My wife continued to swallow it all, until she couldn't take it any more. She pulled her mouth away but continued jacking my cock and squeezing my balls as I continued to moan and groan loudly until my ejaculation subsided. I was lying on my back on the bed now, eyes closed and spent.

I motioned to the box of tissues, still with my eyes closed, and told her to help herself.

"That's okay" she said, "I swallowed most of it. Jesus there was a lot. You just kept on cumming!" She seemed genuinely incredulous.

"Don't act surprised" I replied. "We haven't had sex since last Saturday and you know I was horny on Sunday and Monday - at which point you told me to wait until Wednesday. What were you expecting?"

"Jesus, you saved that all up for me?" she continued, as she pulled a few tissues and started cleaning up all the mess. Her hands and my cock were still splattered. "I thought you might have... you know... during the week?"

And so there you have it. My wife was thinking if she fobbed me off long enough I'd eventually give up and jerk myself off during the week. Still, it was hard to be mad at her since I'd just had a mind-blowing (so long and intense) orgasm. I think even she was impressed by it, and in her own mind probably took all the credit for it. If she kept a diary (she doesn't) she'd say...

Dear Diary, 
Omigod! I am such an awesome cocksucker. Like totally the best. I gave my BF the sickest hand job eva and then I sucked him off like a pornstar and I totally blew his brains out. There was so much cum it was like literally exploding out my mouth I just couldn't swallow it all... 
I am THE BEST girlfriend eva!!!

(No, I don't know why in my mind my wife would make diary entries like a sixteen year old who has just lost her virginity and thinks she knows everything there is to know about sex. For a genuine diary [by someone older than 16] check out this blog)


---~o0o~---

This post has also been submitted to Masturbation Monday

7 comments:

  1. I do have to say this post made me laugh out loud - sometimes your hot posts are amusing too.
    It was a comment you made on my handjob article about only coming from your own hand. Maybe she read it ??
    Thanks for the diary mention - now twitter have shadow-banned me I think I will give that blog a few more posts. The next one is quite hot.

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    1. Given you're one of the few who read/comment my blog I have to wonder if I've been shadow banned too? Maybe I need to switch from Blogger to another platform since I read somewhere that Blogger is near death for sex bloggers.

      I'm glad you see the humor in my posts, I try not to be a whiney grumpy old man ALL the time!

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    2. But I probably could make a better effort at keeping my 'hot' posts purely erotic.

      Delete
  2. I read your posts, but often have trouble commenting on them. I won't know if this one posts until after I try... I hope so, so you know that I loved this, it was funny, hot and worth reading.

    Cimm
    cimmeriansentiment.wordpress.com

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Cimm!
      And that's partly why I'm thinking of leaving Blogger. They make it too hard for some people to comment on my posts. I have the exact same problem on some other blogs too, so I also get frustrated and give up trying to post.
      I used to have a Wordpress blog but it got terminated due to pornographic content. It was the same as the content in this blog. Whaaaat?

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  3. I love this post in that I love reading your thoughts and about the sex you have (once you get to that point) but I also hate that these are the kinds of realizations you have - the assumption you wanked so sex would be "unnecessary" - although I love that you came so damn hard and in such a high volume. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I broke with my usual habit of splitting long posts like these into two parts but I think I'll go back to it. Think it's better to publish one post leading up to the sex (with all the angst/pre-amble I seem compelled to get off my chest) and another part that is just the sexy fun bits. The latter are much better for sharing on memes like your 'Masturbation Monday'!!
      The intensity of the orgasm was due to my wife keeping me on tenterhooks until Wednesday - and then going to sleep. It's probably why I couldn't wait until Saturday!

      Delete

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Remembering an Ex on Fetish Friday