Saturday, March 31, 2018

OPP: #SoSS ~ Anal Sex - Part 2

This image is from May More's © February Photo Fest challenge.
She has such a nice butt I also used this image for Part 1
The #SoSS meme is meant to be a roundup of favourite blogs you’ve visited that week, but this week I'm changing it a little and choosing blog posts that fit a theme. Click the links for the full stories, because these are all just short excerpts. These are in no particular order:

May More ~ If Sex Matters ~ "Anal Play, Anal Sex, Butt Plug Exploration"

I've long thought that people's attitudes to sex are shaped by their earliest sexual experiences, and with anal it's no different. If you have a bad first time then it can be a long time before you're willing to try again:
My passage into anal play began as a late teenager. I socialised and became sexualised within a tight group of mixed gender friends. We were relatively open and often watched dire porn as a leisure activity. It appeared to us that everyone was shoving their fingers and tongues (rimming) in each other’s arses. So this is what we did as a matter of course during sexual activity, and bloody well enjoyed the intensified orgasms we achieved from doing so. It was only later on in life that I realised not all males want to be involved in this kind of set up.

My first boyfriend had a whole list of erotic recreation for us to pursue. One was anal intercourse. I looked at his cock and instinctively knew it wouldn’t fit in my anus without a tub of lubrication. Not to mention a lot of force. So I told him an emphatic “no”. 
My next boyfriend was a darling, with a cock I could visualise in my arse so he got to do [it]. We were together some years but only shared anal sex 2 or 3 times. Even then I felt this was something that should be done sparingly and in the right way.  
So we come to my Ex. By this time I had a much better understanding of the type of sex I enjoyed, which featured bondage for recreational pleasure rather than intimacy. However he didn’t have it in him to spank me or tie me up. 
We both enjoyed anal sex and because he demanded frequent penetrative sex we often turned to this. [Since] I wasn’t getting the kinky thrills I required from other sexual practices, anal intercourse was deviant and sometimes painful enough for the adrenalin to start flowing.... [much more]

Ash ~ 'Sexilicious Ash' "The Gift That Keeps On Giving"

This post involves 'pegging' a.k.a a strap on dildo. I have no interest in being pegged but it's a common (if minor) fantasy amongst plenty of 'straight' women. I thought in fairness to the title '#SoSS ~ Anal Sex' we should also include the other side of the coin. What's good for the goose is good for the gander:
I strapped on my cock and laid in bed waiting for him. When he walked into the bedroom, he saw my hard cock pointing toward the ceiling, waiting for him. He smiled bashfully and asked, "What am I supposed to do with that?" I said, "Well, what would you like to do with it?" 
He climbed on the bed, crawled toward me and then started to lick my cock. I had fantasized about that for so long, I couldn't believe it was finally happening. My eyes rolled back in my head as he started to suck it. I could almost feel what he was doing. My clit started to throb as I watched him bob up and down. 
I was so close to orgasm - and I didn't even have any clitoral stimulation! Husband started to touch my clit gently with his fingers and I moaned in pleasure. He quickened his speed and I started to cum. I knew that I'd be into having someone do that, but I never thought that it would actually bring me to orgasm. It was so surreal and I loved it.

Husband climbed on top of me, lubed up my cock and sat on it. He moaned loudly as my cock entered his ass. He bounced up and down on my cock as I held on tight to his hips. I was loving it just as much as he was. After a while, he leaned in to kiss me and I continued to fuck him while we made out. Soon, I was cumming again
... [more]

Marie Rebelle ~ 'Rebel's Notes' - "Anal Sex - Is it even a Kink?"

This is just a brief excerpt from a post Marie submitted to Kink Of The Week (prompt: Anal).  Marie is a great blogger and if you haven't already checked her out then do so immediately! These are just excerpts so follow the link to entire post.
The first time I had anal sex was a strange but brilliant experience. I had no idea that he had that in mind and when he pushed my legs up and positioned the head of his cock against my rear opening, I wanted him to stop. I can’t remember what he said or how he got me to just relax, but he certainly did something to make me trust him. He was gentle. At first. He slowly entered me. Pushed in bit by bit. It was a weird feeling. I had the feeling that I needed to go to the loo, but I was very much aware of something else too: my clitoris was rock hard and my cunt wet. I could see him push in and out of me and I could see my wetness glistening between my legs, and then… I orgasmed. He did so too, shortly after, spurting his semen deep inside me. But the thing that amazed me the most was that I had climaxed without having my cunt touched.

I have been a fan of anal sex ever since. Master T and I have done it a couple of times, but mostly it ends up with him fingering me. I love when he has frigged my clitoris and fingered my pussy and then unexpectedly slips one or two fingers inside my ass. It always makes for huge orgasms. Sometimes he tells me to turn over on my tummy and then he pours lube between my cheeks and starting with one finger, then work up to two, three, four and sometime five. He hasn’t managed to get his full fist in yet, but who knows, one day he might.

I definitely like to include anal sex when I masturbate. Sometimes I
... [much more]

Friday, March 30, 2018

#fishnetfriday or #fetishfriday ??? πŸ€”

via Instagram 
It's so hard to keep up with the social memes. Is today FishnetFriday or FetishFriday or FriskyFriday? Of course it's all three, but it's so hard to find a pic that covers all the bases. But lawd knows I might be missing out on followers if I don't do it right.

I feel so silly hash tagging MondayBunday, especially when there's also TushieTuesday (aka TushyTuesday - can't miss out on people following that spelling) and now I discover there's an AssWednesday hashtag. Why can't we just hashtag Butt or Ass and be done with it? Oh, that's right - if you use that hashtag too much Instagram and Twitter will shadow ban you.

The morality protocols on social media these days are such a minefield (get it wrong and you're shadow banned for a week or so - or worse, your account is terminated) that I've just joined

They claim they're going to let people post all the naughty pics they like, and write all the naughty words they like, so I've joined - if only to claim my name before someone else does. I'm not active on it yet but I'll keep you updated and let you all know how it goes. If you've also joined let me know your handle in the comments section below. Mine is

Thursday, March 29, 2018

Replay - Weekend Sex

This is a repost of one I originally published way back in May 04, 2016

I got lucky last Friday night, and again on Saturday night.

As I mentioned last Thursday (here), my wife has resumed reading dirty stories on and has also bought a bunch of 'romance' novels on Amazon for her Kindle. She then bought a bunch more on Friday and started reading them too so by Friday night she was primed and ready to fuck. I told you what happened on Friday here, but I ran out of time to tell you about Saturday. It's a short story but worth telling because it's quite rare for me to get it two nights in a row.

It went down like this:

We had a good day together and went out for a casual meal at a local place on Saturday evening. When we got back my wife went online for about an hour on her computer and then 'retired' to bed to do so some reading. Uh huh, I knew where this was going. This time I gave her three hours, before joining her in bed. It was after midnite and she'd heard me coming up so had quickly turned off the light and pretended to be asleep.

Oh, we're playing that game again are we?

I lay in bed in the dark, and within a few minutes she was fidgeting around, as if 'half asleep' but 'restless'. I leaned over and kissed her, and cupped her breast gently. Like the night before, her nipples were hard and stiff. She was aroused. "Are you horny?" I whispered quietly into her ear.

"I'm tired" she said, flatly.

Okay, that is that I thought. I rolled back over to my side and tried to clear my head and go to sleep.

In less than a minute my wife rolled up close and snaked a hand up over me and grabbed my dick again (like she had the previous night).  Okay, maybe that's not that I thought.

"I thought you were tired?" I responded.

"I am tired" she repeated.

I rolled around and she immediately pressed her boobs into my chest, which left my hands caught in front of them. Leaving them where they were I grabbed both breasts (over her nightie) and began manhandling them. She just pressed herself even closer so I continued squeezing her. My hands were in odd places but she was clearly happy with what I was doing so I made no attempt to change positions and just kept doing what I was doing. I was a T-Rex clawing at her boobs!

She reached down and grabbed my cock, and started tugging on it.

"Yeah, let's make it big" she said lustily, "let's jerk that cock and make it big and fat. I want it nice and hard and just the right size before I let you fuck me with it, yeaaah..."

Wow, that was new - she doesn't normally talk like that. It must have been one of the books she was reading, and while I was happy (because I love dirty talk) I was also slightly intimidated. I was already hard, as hard as I was going to get, and I knew I wasn't going to get any harder or 'bigger'. If she was waiting for me to get to 'just the right size' then she was going to be shit out of luck. Sorry lady, but this is it. Don't let those books fool you into thinking I can gain another inch - either in length or girth.

Maybe she read my mind because she stopped talking and reached into her nightstand to grab the lube. She lathered it over both my cock and her pussy and we were good to go. I mounted her missionary style and ground my pubic bone into her clit on the upstroke, since she had seemed to enjoy the pressure when we had done something similar (but completely different) the night before. She started moaning and writhing below me, squeezing her own breasts as she did so.

It was hot. I concentrated hard on making her cum and stopping myself from doing the same.

I lifted her legs and started pounding into her hard, as she grabbed her vulva and pressed firmly against her clit. Her other hand was squeezing one of her tits for all it was worth and I could tell she was very close. I continued pumping her and she grunted that she was cumming and begged me to cum too.

"Cum with me, fill me up, shoot it all inside me, I want it all inside me" she grunted.

Yup, she was reading dirty stories with dirty talk alright - and saying all the right words now!

I loved it but I wasn't ready to cum so I flipped her around onto all fours and did her doggy style. There was almost no break so she was almost immediately ramped back to a second orgasm as I grabbed her hips and thrust deeply. Again she moaned like she was about to cum, dropping her head and mewing into the mattress. With her free hand she started slapping her cunt and began grunting again. My balls were slapping her pussy too now, fighting with her fingers for access to her clit.

She found a rhythm, stroking my balls and her clit at the same as I rode her hard.

"Uh-nghhhh" she grunted, "I'm cummmm-innng!"

And she did, hissing through gritted teeth as she squeezed out a second orgasm. I held still as she pulsed around my dick, before releasing her and letting her fall forward onto the mattress. Looking at her ass as she slumped on the bed I started jacking my cock again, in long slow strokes. I decided I wanted to jerk off and spray my hot jism down her ass crack, as we'd done many times before. I pulled her up again into the doggy position, and placed my cock at the entrance to her back door.

I jacked my cock, leaving the head right between her crack, teasing myself with the fantasy of plunging forward and taking her there. I felt my spunk churning in my balls as I imagined how tight her ass would feel, wrapped around my stiff prick. I knew I was close, but before I could tell her my wife jumped forward and away from me. Turning around as she did so she told me what she wanted:

"Cum on my tits"

She grabbed them both and swirled her fingers around the stiff nipples. "Right here" she continued, pulling her breasts apart slightly to show me where she wanted it.

I had actually been ready to cum on her ass seconds earlier so her move had been kind of disruptive, but I sucked it up and got back to work. I spread her legs wide and walked on my knees up between her legs until my balls were resting on her pussy. They bounced on her clit as I jacked my cock and it wasn't long before a steady stream of cum was flying up and onto her tits. I mashed my balls into her hot pussy as I jerked the last few drops of spunk out of my cock and onto her belly button.

It took a while to clean up (the sperm seemed to be everywhere) but finally we were both snuggled down and drifting quickly off to sleep. As I fell into slumber I mused at my own good fortune: I'd had sex two nights in a row and this almost never happens! But my wife seemed to be responding really well to the erotic fiction so I wondered what tomorrow night (Sunday) would bring. Was a third sexual encounter on the cards, or was I being greedy?

Sadly it was not to be, but not for the reasons you might think...

Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Check out the bra!

via Instagram 

Check out the bra! Burlesque artist @roxi_dlite for #fetishfriday Wicked Wednesday

(Through the magic of Blogger I've moved Friday's Instagram post back in time to Wednesday, since I hadn't posted anything on Wednesday)

Tuesday, March 27, 2018

TMI Tuesday: March 27, 2018 ~ Feels So Good

via Instagram

1. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, your future, what would you want to know?
~ what would my life be like if I hadn't met/married my wife?
~ where did we/I go wrong with my daughter? will it get better?
~ when/how will I die?
~ what will my daughter's life be like after I'm gone?

2. What do you value most in your sex life?
~ I may be misunderstanding the question but... I value sharing a sexual bond/intimacy with that other person; and I value their enthusiasm  to share that with me also. I hate it when sex is perfunctory or -worse- pityfucks.

3. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
~ if it's funny, nothing. But life has taught me I'm almost alone in that opinion - some people do not find my dark humor funny, and some subjects are off limits. As I neglected to mention in yesterday's post, it all depends on the context. Health, wealth, and death are touchy subjects.

4. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one in which you currently live, where would you move and why?
~ New York, I love it there. And I can fly anywhere from there.

5. Are you too nice?
~ Yes. My wife says so. Sometimes.

Bonus: Falling in love is _____ . (one word only)
~ everything!

Double Bonus: I was going to say 'mandatory' but 'everything' is more romantic. And besides, it's not mandatory to be in love with someone to have sex with them.

Triple Bonus: this post was originally an Instagram post from March 21, hence the initial comments you'll see below. I recycled it since it was the perfect picture for Q4. The post originally said:
"Everyone wants to know where I live? I live in a rainbow house with unicorns and fairies and hot naked models who can’t get enough of me of course! 

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Monday, March 26, 2018

Masturbation Monday - BOOBS!!

The prompt for Masturbation Monday this week is mouth watering boobs. If you want to see mouthwatering boobs then look no further than May More - her Sinful Sunday post yesterday (here) had me salivating. My wife's boobs are nice too, but (like May) she doesn't let me play with them very often. (May doesn't let me play with them at all, let's be clear on that - we've never even met IRL!) This photo below happened as part of a one off episode of role playing, which was very hot (see here) but never happened again.

And if the opening paragraph isn't clear, yes those are my wife's boobs, not May's. I say 'boobs' because the colloquial term one chooses can be a loaded subject with women. Some women hate it when you refer to their breasts as 'tits', regardless of the common vernacular. I save that word (and/or 'titties') for dirty talk since you're kinda in the zone then and it would be churlish to get hung up on it. 

'Boobies' is an immature word, one I rarely use, unless I'm being playful or humorous. It's the closest I'll get to baby talk, in fact I'll probably only use it if I'm mirroring your girlish mood.

'Funbags' is a word even I can't stand, and I recoil in horror whenever I see it in print. I couldn't imagine ever saying it out loud and I'm gagging right now just typing it. I love women's breasts and I will totally objectify them in the right circumstances but to refer to them in vulgar terms like 'fun bags' (or similar) demeans women as far as I'm concerned.

As for size, I have no preference. I tend to be with women in the 'mid range' and have never been with anyone with overly large or small breasts. All women are beautiful and I tend not to fetishize boobs. I'm more of an Ass Man than a Tit Man if truth be told, and when it comes to boobs I'm more interested in your nipples. Those I fetishize!

There is nothing more mouth watering than a ripe full breast with a big hard nipple poking out in my book. Well, maybe a ripe juicy pussy - but let's stay with this week's prompt! I love licking and gently biting hard nipples. And kissing and sucking them. And pulling on them, either with my teeth or fingers. I love squeezing boobs too - maybe I am a breast man after all?

So, dear reader, tell me in the comments below what words you use to describe a woman's breasts. The words you really use. And ladies especially - tell us also what words you hate being used when a guy refers to your... titties.


This post has also been submitted to Masturbation MondayClick this link for more confessions like mine!

Sunday, March 25, 2018

What Would Freud Say?

The minute I left the house on Saturday afternoon my wife started searching Kindleporn
(start from the bottom and read up to see the order she browsed in)

Day 25 and still no sex with my wife. Last night was Saturday night but... well, let's all agree that our  her promise to have more sex with me by 'scheduling' sexual intimacy on Wednesday and Saturday has well and truly fallen by the wayside. But, as the above web search proves, clearly she's not lost her libido - she's just lost her interest in having sex with me.

Below are the titles she actually bought, which I agree are more Chick Lit than Clit Lit, so you don't need to point that out. But after buying them she did go on to browse raunchier titles. I guess she's too scared to buy those - besides, she can find that stuff for free on (see here for the list of stories she read on Literotica earlier this month)

I wonder what Freud might make of the title choices?

Saturday, March 24, 2018

OPP: #SoSS ~ The Sybian

Warning: Not only is the Sybian noisy AF, the blonde is a screamer too - check your volume settings before pressing play!

The #SoSS meme is meant to be a roundup of favourite blogs we’ve visited that week, but this week I'm again changing it a little and choosing blog posts that fit a theme. Today I've picked a rather expensive sex toy that I've had no experience with - the Sybian. 
It has always fascinated me, since I first saw videos of it in action on the free porn sites 10 years ago. It looks so awesome, but of course those videos were made by the manufacturer and used paid actors a.k.a pornstars. If you've actually used one personally I'd love to hear your stories in the comments section below.  
As always, click the links for the full stories, because these are just short excerpts. These are in no particular order:

Marisa Black ~ Dodson & Ross "Straddling the Saddle: My First Ride on the Sybian"

I have to confess that this first excerpt is a cheat - I used google. I had one positive experience about the Sybian from a sex blogger but I misplaced the link, so Replaced it with this one. It seems genuine and as you'll see if you follow the link Betty Dodson (co-owner of the site) doesn't like the Sybian. I recommend you follow the link and read the comments on the original post as they are quite amusing:
Knees cushioned by well-placed pillows, I lifted my body up and down, up and down, riding the rotating and vibrating cock. I alternated the riding with resting my pussy lips against the vibration. Back arched, mouth open, lids heavy, I floated into the realm of extreme ecstasy where time fades and everything is washed away except the pleasure rippling through my body.

After several minutes of orgasms drifting into each other, indistinguishable, I began cranking the vibration knob. The strength of the vibration made me gasp and I fell forward, palms pressed against the wood floor. I rocked back and forth, hair falling around my face, hips grinding in a circle, pushing my engorged clit and lips against the machine nestled between my thighs
... [much more]

Sammi ~ Squeaky Bedsprings "How a Sybian Made Me Contemplate My Entire Life"

Sammi is a twenty something college student in pursuit of pleasure. She blogs about sex - mainly sex toys and her own adventures. She describes herself as "a queer cis lady, and currently I am dating a lovely cis male human named Simon":

These past few weeks I got to play with a Sybian. I had chattered about it to my friends for months, thrilled to use this famous toy. I invited my friends to try it, and fantasized about the ways I could use it. This chance to play with a Sybian was supposed to be an exciting learning and sharing experience.  
I contemplated throwing my first play party (although that was before I realized I don’t have enough down-to-orgy sex posi friends in real life to invite to my tiny-ass apartment). Instead, this majestic giant vibrator simply stared at me from the corner of my room until I had to throw a blanket over it because the landlord toured my apartment. Awkward. 
However, after all the fanciful plans and aspirations, I only got to use it a handful of times. It sucks to realize how little I get to do the things that make me happy, like having my junk jiggled on a giant ride-on vibrator, but also... [more]

M ~ Cammies On The Floor "Sybian"

M needs no introduction to sex bloggers and has featured previously in my #SoSS posts. This is part of a story she wrote about her experience with a Sybian, not an actual review, so go to the original link to get the full picture:

I came back to the porn room in the swinger’s club and talked with some female friends. They mentioned how they had tried the sybian in the next room, and inquired if I had tried the machine. I was already overcome with shyness and not talking much by this point, not to mention that was I was very tired from the day’s events, so didn’t do much more than shake my head.
When I expressed that I had not but I was curious to try, David took my hand and steered me towards that room. Yes, I was tired, and incredibly shy, but I was so very curious, and really my curiosity almost always wins.

He went to the front desk and got the “box of cocks” for the machine, and the front lady sat in the room and explained things about the machine before leaving the room. I picked what she said was a favorite dildo for many, and then David took the control.

He told me to get fully naked. As I was undressing, he played with the controls and figured out how the machine worked. I slipped a condom over the dildo and straddled the machine, leaning forward the way the lady advised.

David started very slowly and I didn’t really get a lot out of it. At about fifty percent power, it felt good, but I had just had multiple orgasms, so a lot felt good. On stronger power, it did give me an orgasm, but again – that was only because I had just multipled. The machine on its own would not give me my first orgasm, as it vibrates more than penetrates, and I ....

Bonus clip: unlike the pornstar featured at the top of the page, this clip has all the appearances of being made by a 'real woman' a.k.a. an unpaid actor?

Friday, March 23, 2018

A Question for Fetish Friday...

Just for fun, since it’s #fetishfriday - which of these outfits would you like your lover to buy you? πŸ€” 
Answers in the comments below, numbered 1-9, moving left to right 😎😈 
To purchase go to @mrwilliamwilde (on Instagram or Twitter)

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Throwback Thursday ~ Sunday Sex - and Tuesday too!

My wife has trained me how to eat her just right...

This post was originally published  Wednesday, December 23, 2015. This is an excerpt, you can read the whole thing here.

"I want to eat your pussy" I said, as I pulled off the covers. 
As is her habit, she feigned refusal but did nothing to stop me once I bent down and pulled her ankles apart. She spread her knees wide to invite me in, and then clamped her thighs around my head as I went in. She moaned as I swirled my tongue around her pussy, before moving in on the clit. She was already very wet, so I wasted no time. Once I found the spot I kept hitting the mark - my tongue pressed hard and flat against her clit, movement limited to a pulsing back and forward - which is how my wife likes it. She doesn't like the fancy stuff, trust me, she wants it the way she wants it. 
I could feel my wife's hand on my head, pressing me in harder and deeper... 
"What are those?" she asked 
"Condoms" I replied 
"Really?" she said, not sure what was happening.
"Yeah, it'll be fun" I responded, throwing the box to her "you can put it on and pretend you're my dirty whore, fucking me for money". 
That made her smile, and she opened the box like it was Christmas. She pulled out a condom, ripped it open and peeled it down over my dick. It had crossed my mind to tell her do it with her mouth, like a real prostitute, but I saw no upside in that. Besides, she was into it already - and into it quite quickly I noted to myself. As soon as the condom was on she mounted me in the reverse cowgirl position and started bouncing. She was already wet.
Seriously, it happened that fast. 
So I was on my back, my wife was bouncing on my cock and rubbing her clit and squeezing her tits, and it felt great. I'm not sure if she came, but she leaned down and put her head on the bed, and continued thrusting back at me. I took that as my cue to get up and mount her doggy style. She moaned as I re-entered her and said in a low voice "Yeah, fuck me deep". I did exactly that, holding her hips and thrusting in long steady strokes. 
Soon I progressed to 'pounding' and she urged me on, imploring me to fuck her harder and faster. She was talking quite dirty and I loved it. She started slapping her clit with her free hand and...

Wednesday, March 21, 2018

Everyone is feeling Sad this week!

This image made me sad once - find out why by clicking here

Wicked Wednesday
Be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked!

So reads the tagline on the Wicked Wednesday site, but this weeks 'prompt' is... Sadness. I wasn't going to participate this week because it seemed like such a downer but as fate would have it something happened that made me sad, so... here I go:

Regular readers of this blog will know I regularly complain about the lack of sexual intimacy between me and my wife. I'm well aware that this comes across as bleating, moaning, whining, whingeing, or whatever word you would care to use. I just wish I could articulate how sad it makes me that we don't have sex more often.

We're in our early 50s and there is no reason why we shouldn't. Other than that I don't generate any desire in her, of course. And that's what makes me sad. She used to be sexually vivacious and we had sex all the time when we were younger. Up to three times a day when we first started living together. But youth fades and I get that, and you have to keep the spark alive and I get that too.

I've tried hard over the years to spice things up, to add spontaneity and novelty to our sexual routine, and while those efforts have worked in and of themselves, they haven't fired her libido in any meaningful way. She does not desire sex with me, so unless I push (hard) for it to happen it doesn't happen. This is sad.

Saddest of all is that I know she is a sexual being and she has her own needs and desires - things that she doesn't share with me. I know she reads a lot of dirty stories (just check out the tags marked Kindle Porn and Literotica below to see those posts) and they can be pretty extreme genres. I used to know what she was reading on Literotica simply by checking her browser history on her iPad, but since she changed her passcode at the end of last year I have been left in the dark.

She denies she reads Literotica anymore, and this year she has made a point of insisting she only reads 'Chick Lit' on Kindle now, not 'Clit Lit'.  On the rare occasions this year that I've caught her on her iPad, reading Kindle, she would indeed be reading a romance novel - not a bodice ripping 'someone-gets-fucked-ine every-chapter' piece of erotica.

And so we come to the thing that made me sad enough to join the Wicked Wednesday prompt this week...

My wife left her iPad open and I was able to check her browser history. It turns out she is indeed still using Literotica regularly, and she's still into some fairly extreme genres. Normally I post pictures of the screen grabs I take (see here and here and here) but there are soooo many titles I can't just publish twenty eight pages of browser history. It would seem all my wife does on her iPad is read Kindleporn or Literotica - she switches to Facebook when she sees me coming it seems.

Listed below are just a few of the stories she was reading in the days leading up to and including the last time we had sex (Feb 28 - "I had sex last night" - that's three weeks ago)! The following are from just 6 of the 28 pages of browser history I captured. 

Japanese 'Hentai' - a.k.a. Anime porn, which always features girls
of a dubious or ambiguous age! Sometimes they look decidedly underage
- but always with elf ears and/or tails to show they're not human. So it's okay, right?
Trigger Warning: All titles are from the 'Incest' genre on

How Do You Seduce Your Daughter
Expecting & Expectations
A Sweet Life
Grandpa Fills In The Gap
Daddy & James Partner Up
Summer With Daddy
What Once Was Innocent
Daddy's Fuck Toy
Stepdad's Summer Secretary
Daddy's Girl
A Move To Daddy's
Home Invasion
Daddy's Breeding Slut
A Daughter Belong's To Her Daddy
Three Days In A Ditch
Daddy's Poker Chip
Mom Was Wrong
Lexi Classified
Daddy Seeded Me
Spring Break Wife
Stop It, Daddy!
Drunk daddy
Bless Me Father
Daddy Takes What's His
A Cock For Vikki
The Summer That Changed Everything
Fooling My Stepdaughter
Discovering Daddy
What Mama Don't Know
Adopted Black Daughter
Julie's Panythose

I understand that people often chose erotica about stuff they'd never want to experience in real life (forced submission, torture, etc) but given our daughter recently turned sixteen it's starting to feel a little creepy. I guess I should be grateful she'd not reading the 'Interracial' genre right now, because I certainly can't match those big black studs with their massive cocks.

So to conclude... I am sad because my wife seems to be having all her needs met via online porn these days. I'm here if she wants me, but... apparently my service are not required.

To finish on a positive note... it's my birthday in two weeks so I'm sure to get laid then, right? Maybe my wife is 'saving it all up' for a special night on my special day? I'll keep you posted!


This post has also been submitted to Wicked Wednesday

click here for more 'Wicked Wednesday' stories (NSFW)

Tuesday, March 20, 2018

TMI Tuesday: March 20, 2018 ~ The Life You Want

Not the Twins I spent a summer with, but yes they were this hot... (image via Instagram)
1. Who was the first person you ever had a crush on? Why did you like them?
~ I'm over 50 so I really don't remember. Generally if I crushed on someone I would ask them out. If they declined my crush would usually be over fairly quickly. I guess yesterday's post could be labelled 'My First Crush'. It's all true and I remember it as clearly as I told it. I liked her because she was pretty and me feel funny.

2. What is the most important material possession you have and why?
~ I guess it's my phone? Because it keeps me connected to people online via Facebook and Twitter. Not great, but IRL I don't meet people that often since I am now 'retired'

3. If you were a cake which cake would you be?
~ Banana cake. With chocolate icing/frosting. Because I love banana cake with chocolate frosting/icing. Or with vanilla or chocolate ice cream, I'm not picky.

4. Has anything/anyone every saved your life before?
~ No, but I have saved other people. Both were toddlers - one floating/drowning in a pool, the other standing in traffic with cars approaching.

5. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
~ Invisibility. So I could where I couldn't be seen, and see things I wasn't meant to be see. But don't worry, you'll be safe. My asthma will probably give me away most of the time.

Bonus: Do you have a dream you’re pursuing? Tell us about it.
~ Still trying to develop a residential property I own. It's currently rented by I'm able to subdivide it into four lots. I have so many options on how to develop it I can't decide!

Double Bonus: Q1: I've just remembered something that happened one summer when I was about 14. The local school had a pool and a two week activity program so my mother signed me up. It was really just 'babysitting' masquerading as something more palatable for bored teens. Anyway, most afternoons were 'free time' in the pool so I spent a lot of time with two twin sisters who were about 16. We hung out together a lot, probably because I was a nonthreatening kid compared to them. This meant they were very flirty and there was a lot of innocent touching disguised as 'water play'.
I crushed on them madly but of course being older and hot AF they were well out of my league. So I did nothing, other than enjoy our time together. In retrospect I realize they were discovering their own sexual power and were probably having immense fun making me hard all the time. When you're 14 and in a pool with two hot twins in bikinis you're pretty much a walking swimming erection. Which is why I stayed in the water so long. Which I realize, in retrospect, didn't hide anything.

Triple Bonus: Floss has just reminded me of another ability I'd love (Q5) - Time Travel! The ability to travel backwards and forwards in time would be fascinating. And being able to be invisible while doing it would be doubley awesome!!

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Call me!

via Instagram 

Monday, March 19, 2018

Miss Green's Boots

Masturbation Monday image prompt provided by sub-Bee of  A to sub Bee ©

When I was about six years old I sat cross legged on the mat in front of our new schoolteacher as she read the class a story. Her name was Miss Green and she was a 'trainee teacher' and would only be at the school for a week, assisting in various classes. She was very young and pretty. We were all told to be nice to Miss Green because if we were she might come back to our school permanently. 

It was story time and we were all seated on the mat as she sat on a chair and read to us. I was seated right at her feet because I really liked Miss Green already. She was young and very pretty.

It was the early 70s and Miss Green was wearing brown suede boots. They had a chunky high heel and the boot went right up to her knee. The suede boots had matching suede laces that ran from her foot and criss-crossed all the way up the front of her leg, finishing in a bow at the top of the knee. The laces were cinched tight via a series of metals hooks, similar to what you might see on a corset today.

Whether Miss Green wore a corset I do not know, because I was only six.

As Miss Green read her story I could look all the way up her legs and almost under her skirt. Well, I could look up her skirt but I couldn't see anything because she sat with one leg over the other, crossed politely, and blocking my view of her underwear. They wore them short back then so I saw enough to make a six year old boy feel things he didn't understand. 

As Miss Green continued with her long and boring story my attention returned to her suede leather lace up boots.  

They did not look like my mother's footwear so I reached out and touched them. The suede felt funny so I stroked my finger tip up and down her boot, leaving a dark trail along the path my finger had taken. It felt really good so I kept doing it - running my finger up and down and around her boot. I did it really slowly so Miss Green wouldn't notice. 

The tingly feeling in my finger spread all over and I felt funny. It was a weird feeling and I couldn't understand or explain it. I just know I liked it so I kept doing it. Sometimes I ran my finger all the way up to Miss Green's knee, but she never once brushed me away or told me to stop. I was in such a daze I didn't think to look up when Miss Green re-crossed her legs right in front of me. Instead I was mesmerized by the long suede leather lace bows as they danced before me when she moved. 

Even though I was no longer listening I could still hear Miss Green's sweet voice as she continued with her story, and my head felt like it was filled with honey.

And that, boys and girls, is how Mr Nero first fell in love with women...


This post has also been submitted to Masturbation Monday. You can (and should) read the story behind sub-Bee's photo here. Click this link for more stories like mine!

Sunday, March 18, 2018

OPP: #SoSS ~ March 18

South Park satirize the societal double standard (hypocrisy!) relating to female sexual abuse of young boys

The #SoSS meme is a roundup of favourite blogs I’ve visited this week. In order not to duplicate what others have done for #SoSS (Share Our Shit Saturday) (or Sunday if you run out of time like I did!!) I’m going to give you links to some of their older stuff - because I think their complete blogs are worth reading. Click the links for the full stories, because these are just excerpts.

Sweetgirl ~ Sweetgirl's Journal "Challenging Myself"

Sweetgirl is a self described 'submissive wife' but has only been in a D/s relationship with her partner of 23 years, MrH. I chose this post because I've been wondering about my wife lately. Ladies, the best advice I can give you is to let your partner know what you want - we're not mind readers so they only way it will happen is if your share it with us:
I’ve recently been talking about how I struggle to tell MrH my desires while looking at him.

I hide my face, feeling embarrassed at the things that turn me on.

So this morning I challenged myself to tell MrH two things that turn me on, while looking at him and while he looked at me.

He didn’t react with anything negative, he didn’t look disgusted which of course is my fear. Instead he said, “sounds interesting” which I take to mean he likes the ideas... 

Karin Bird ~ The Swing Shift "And Then There Was Stewart"

Karin is a woman on a sexual mission – a self-described ‘middle aged’ professional who wants to prove that sex does not end in your thirties, or when you get a bit fat, or marry the wrong person. Her blog is all about her journey, and how it led her to her 'Daddy'. I was going to excerpt something else (which I'll do in a later #SoSS) but I thought I'd start with this recollection of a previous lover:
When I walked into the barStewart stood up and I had my first good look at him. Now, I have to tell you I have known a lot of men in my time. Never has a man had quite the effect on me that Stewart did. Even seeing him from across the room was like being pushed against a wall and kissed hard. I don’t know how I was still standing after that first look!
He took my hand and lead me up to the room he had booked. Stewart said, “I am going to go and have a cigarette. Get undressed and put your hands on the desk.” I followed these orders and when he came back he gave me a solid spanking.

He got undressed and I sucked his cock. Despite its size, it fit perfectly in my mouth. We fucked, which was amazing, and again a perfect fit
... [much more]

Jack ~ Frisky In The 916 "It Happens To Boys Too"

Jack is a regular contributor to the TMI Tuesday meme and recently blogged on a topic that few people are willing to take on, Childhood Abuse:

The main reason why I’ve been so slow to acknowledge the insidiousness of her actions is because, to my mindset, it didn’t fit the profile. I was a boy. She was a woman. 
Wasn’t abuse usually perpetrated by men against girls, or as we all saw on that very special episode of Diff’rent Strokes, against boys? Women just didn’t do that, did they? I’m not saying that it wasn’t in their nature or anything; the relative in question had certainly always seemed self-serving and exploitative. Had I given it more than a cursory thought, I probably wouldn’t have put anything past her. It’s just that, as far as I could tell at age fourteen or however old I might have been when these things occurred, a straight-identified boy couldn’t be abused by a woman to whom he was attractive. I mean, it just wasn’t possible, was it?

As boys, we are taught to value sex with women. It’s a goal to which to aspire. It’s something to which we are told – verbally or through subtle programming – that we are entitled. So why would a boy below the legal age of consent who has sex with – or is groomed by – an older woman consider that abuse? He’s likely to consider it a victory.

At the time that the relative in question was prancing around in a new bikini, giving me up-close looks at her ample breasts and ass, I was happy with it. When she was making plans to take me camping on the Oregon Coast the summer after my junior year of high school, I didn’t consider that abuse. As she was pointing out every porn shop in her neighborhood when I’d come up to visit; just to put it in my head that she was aware of such things and that she thought about them, and perhaps to make me think about visiting such an establishment – or consuming its wares – with her, I was excited
... [much more] 

It’s Sinful Sunday 😈

via Instagram

It’s #SinfulSunday 😈

πŸ“Έ & #latex #rubber by @libidex #latexfetish #rubberfetish #latexfashion #sexy #madonna #neroblogshere

Saturday, March 17, 2018

St Patrick's Day Orgy

I realise in previous years I have posted some very lame pictures on St Patrick's Day. Even though I think it is a silly day (what are we 'celebrating'? getting drunk?) I resolved last year that I would try to do better this year with my image choices.

Here are some photos from the St Patrick's Day event I attended last year. We all got drunk and it degenerated into an orgy - I think it was my shoes that got the ladies excited...

Friday, March 16, 2018

Is it #fishnetfriday or #fetishfriday ??

via Instagram

Is it #fishnetfriday or #fetishfriday?? @mistresstt.s has all bases covered!!

#mistress #leather #fetish #fishnets #leatherjacket #fishnetstockings 

Thursday, March 15, 2018

OPP: Two Truths and a Lie

The actual post by May More I'm excerpting from is called "Meet & Greet Me & My Wellington Boots at Eroticon" which is timely given that Eroticon is on this weekend in London. Too far for me I'm afraid because as much as I heart May I'm not ready to cross oceans for her. Not yet. Maybe if she stops blogging about how much she loves her man I might consider it... or if he gets struck by a meteor. 

Or run over by a bus.
These are 'Wellington Boots' apparently © May More (who has very nice long legs)

A bus which coincidently ran over my wife as well...

Hey, I'm not wishing this on anyone but if it were to happen then surely it's a sign that the universe thinks we should maybe at least have a coffee together and see where things go, right? Just sayin'

For legal reasons I need to tell you now that I was nowhere near that bus, and certainly not driving it. I don't even know how to drive a bus.

Actually that's a lie, they're really easy to drive since they're all mostly automatic now. I know because I stole one once, during my miscreant youth, and took it for a joyride.

A ten foot joyride, since the bus was full of my school friends who were all egging me on but then some of the girls screamed when I actually drove forward, so I stopped because I couldn't trust that one of them wouldn't snitch.

Luckily for me no-one did, even when the driver came back and asked who moved the bus. Lucky for them too because #BitchesGetStitches! Or is that #SnitchesGetStitches? I can't keep up with street slang anymore.

But I digress.

May More's "Meet & Greet Me & My Wellington Boots at Eroticon" is well worth a read in full but I want to focus on one small part of it. Eroticon presumably have sent the same questionnaire to all participants, and May's response to one question really had me going:

Tell us two truths and a lie about yourself
  • I love to have my cunt waxed
  • A topless photo of me once appeared in a soft porn magazine
  • I have never watched a star wars movie

I've been following May's daily blog* for at least a year now but I realized I had no idea which of the above was the lie. This set me thinking, and I left the following comment on her post:

I have spent some time trying to decide which of the 3 statements is a lie. That I can’t actually make a decision says a lot about you May! 
I love to have my cunt waxed 
I know you like it bare, but does that mean you enjoy getting it waxed? Some women enjoy the results but not the process. But you’re not averse to a little pain with your pleasure, so maybe you do enjoy the waxing? I still don’t know if this is the lie, but I did spend a lot of time thinking about it. Well, your smooth bald pussy to be precise. 
A topless photo of me once appeared in a soft porn magazine 
Given that we never see your face one could assume this is the lie. But then again you have blogged about your sexually open youth and… maybe someone sent in a candid shot of you to the local ‘Readers Wives’ for a laugh? Maybe you did it yourself, on a dare? All things are possible and upon reflection this one might not be so impossible to believe after all. 
I have never watched a Star Wars movie 
My initial thought was that there have been so many Star Wars movies over the decades that at least one of your boyfriends must have dragged you along to at least one of them. But then I’ve never seen ‘Dirty Dancing’ either, which every woman I’ve met seems to have watched at least 3 times. So maybe you were able to fend of your BF’s desire to see it – which is a shame because you’d make an awesome Princess Leia.

So now I’m imagining you as Princess Leia, but your white robe is see through and we can clearly see your beautiful bald cunt – and your amazing breasts are bursting out of the plunging v-neck of your robe as the photographer from Sci Fi Nerds Wives magazine snaps pictures…
Thanks, I think I’ve got my next #MasturbationMonday post sorted! :-)

*Actually May has two blogs, one in present day (If Sex Matters) and one from her youth, using old diaries (Before May Mattered). And just to complicate things she posted all her 2018 February PhotoFest images in Before May Mattered, because.

Anyway, if you're bored you can post your own 'Two Truths and a Lie' in the comments below and I'll try to guess which is which. And if you're going to Eroticon and you see a woman in rubber boots (as pictured above) give her a slap on the 'arse' and tell her it's from me - her old pal Nero!

Actually better not, it's 2018 and we don't just randomly smack women's asses anymore. Not without permission! Probably best you just buy her a coffee and tell her it's from me - her old pal Nero! Or tea - I hear they drink that a lot in the UK.